Walls and Bridges

This is not about the border wall that has been talked about so much in political circles. It is much more intimate than that. This has to do with walls and bridges that we put up between us and other people: our spouse, our family, our friends, our neighbors, and our co-workers (the people closest to us).

Even a fortress has a drawbridge.  Back in medieval times when a castle was built, if they really wanted to make it secure they built a moat around it. I don’t know if it had alligators or not, but just the fact that it was surrounded by water made it harder for someone to get in. The only way to get into the castle was over the drawbridge.

People have a way of putting up walls between themselves and others. Sometimes it is necessary because of abuse or neglect, but often it is just due to hurt feelings and lack of forgiveness. If it is abuse or neglect, be very careful about letting that bridge down. You should never allow anyone to abuse you.

If it is hurt feelings or lack of forgiveness that has caused you to build a wall, consider lowering the drawbridge and allowing the other person into your life again. Forgiving them is the first step in restoring a relationship. Open dialog can only happen if you are willing to talk to them about how your feel and try to understand how they feel.

I realize that it is an impossible dream to fully love everyone, but we can at least do our part, right? We can’t control what others do, but we can control what we do. If we do the right thing and lower the drawbridge to allow others in, good things can happen. Don’t allow the fear of getting hurt keep you from having meaningful relationships. Fear and love won’t live in the same room. One of them has to go, and it might as well be fear that you let go of.

You can’t live a life of isolation and expect to reap anything close to peace, happiness, and contentment. Let go of the fear, lower the bridge, and learn to live fully and freely. Love is the bridge.

Shalom!

Dan Skognes

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