Everyone on the planet can be categorized in one of two ways. You are either a giver or a taker. Now before you start arguing that you are both, I agree with you, but everyone tends to be more of one than the other. I would agree that you should have a healthy balance of both. In fact, if you are not balanced, you are dysfunctional.
Givers tend to have these qualities:
- They tend to ask, “How will this affect everyone else?”
- They get true joy in giving to others.
- They are unselfish.
- They are nurturing by nature.
- They have a hard time saying no when asked for help.
- They tend to be listeners and feelers.
Takers also have similar qualities:
- They tend to ask, “What is in in for me?
- Their joy comes from personal accomplishments.
- They are driven and focused.
- They may come across as cold and unfeeling.
- They have a hard time saying yes when asked for help.
- They tend to be talkers and thinkers.
The problem is that to have a truly happy and fulfilling life, you need to have some of both. There are times you need to give and times you need to take. Neither one is inherently evil in and of itself, but if you are too much one way, it is not healthy. If you are too giving, you are seen as a doormat and people will take advantage of your giving nature. If you are too much of a taker, people will resent you and avoid being around you for fear of being taken advantage of.
When you look in the mirror, what do you see? Is it primarily a giver or a taker? Are you balanced in both areas? My challenge to you is that if you are a giver, learn that you have to respect yourself and say no at times; otherwise you become a doormat for the takers. If you are the bull that runs over people, learn that nobody else is going to want to be around you if you trample on them. Learn the art of listening to others and consider their feelings.
I hope you find balance in your life of give and take.