Jackson

Posted in General, Motivational, Relationships

Jackson - dan skognes insurance finance motivation blogger speaker entrepreneur

Jackson was a rescue dog.  He was to be put down within a day of him being rescued.  He was not a puppy. He was a large dog, and a mixed breed on top of that; so the odds were not in his favor that anyone would take him.

Fortunately for Jackson, my Grandson listened to his Aunt (who has worked with a lot of animals), and took Jackson home.  He is probably the best dog I have been around.  I have two dogs of my own, Laila, a boxer, and Molly, a Lhasa-poo.  They are sweet and I love them a lot…but Jackson is special.

He is not even my dog, but I feel in a way that he is.  When I first met Jackson, he just took to me.  He loved me for no special reason.   I can’t explain it, but he just wants to be around me.  He likes sitting next to me and loves it when I give him attention.  He is very needy that way…LOL…but I admit it.  I love him.  He follows me everywhere I go.

Our daughter and son-in-law take good care of Jackson, but even they are a little shocked at how much Jackson loves me.  When we are dog sitting and he is spending a few days with us, they sometimes have to encourage him to leave!  He look at me as if to say, “Is it ok for me to go with them?”  LOL.  That does NOT go over especially well with them, by the way.

Jackson has a unique trait.  EVERYONE loves him.  He has a disposition that is magnetic.  He makes people smile, and they love his eyes.  They are multi-colored.  We are not sure what breed he is, but probably part Greyhound and part Catahoula.

Jackson is one of those dogs that looks like he is smiling.  He has a happy face.  He loves to play, to ride in the car and go anywhere.  He loves to go for walks…and especially to go to the dog park.  He just likes being around people and their dogs. He loves taking naps, and loves playing with the toys.  He especially likes getting the squeaker out of the toys. That almost sounds like a profile for a dating site.  He loves long walks on the beach and romantic times by the fireplace, too.  LOL.

He is very smart, and knows how to figure things out. If you hide a toy in something, he will work on it until he gets it.  He does not get upset or discouraged. He just finds a way to get what he wants.

A few things Jackson has modeled for me:

  • Love everyone.  He never meets a stranger.
  • Love people just because.  He only wants to love and be loved.
  • Enjoy the day.  The simple things we do matter.  Take joy in the simple things.
  • Smile a lot.  It makes other people smile when you are happy. They want what you have. Wag your tail (only if you are a dog…LOL).
  • The one dog you may be overlooking at the pound just may turn out to be the best dog in the world for you.  It does not matter what breed, how old they are, or how large they are.  Look into their eyes…and into their heart.  You will know when you see it.
  • Jackson did not know he was one day away from meeting his Maker.  We don’t know when our time is going to come either.  Live each day like it is your last.
  • Pursue what you really want, and don’t give up!

I fondly refer to Jackson as “My Son.”  He is not mine, but he sure has made his impression on my heart.  So, in a way, he IS mine. He is a good boy!

Shalom!

Dan Skognes

Practice What You Preach

Posted in Motivational, Relationships

Practice What You Preach dan skognes insurance finance motivation blogger speaker entrepreneur

You might have heard this phrase before.  It is typically a response from someone to get you to look in the mirror.  My wife actually told me the other day, “You need to take your own advice.”  LOL.  Ouch.  Not what I wanted to hear, but it is what I needed to hear.

It is very easy to give advice and tell others what to do to fix their relationships, fix their finances, and fix themselves.  We are natural-born fixers.  We do this effortlessly.  Isn’t it funny when you see someone that you love and care about struggling, or even a stranger for that matter, the first thing you want to do is fix it.  You have the answers, if they would just listen!

OK, here is the hard part for all of us.  We have to “Walk the walk,” meaning if we are going to tell someone else what to do or how to do it, we better be doing it ourselves.

How can anyone really take your advice seriously if you don’t listen to your own advice?  HELLO!!!  Are you feeling just a little uncomfortable about all this?  Am I getting too personal?  Good, because I am very uncomfortable looking at myself and seeing all the flaws that need to be fixed.

I realize that I have to practice what I preach.  I have to walk the walk, not just talk the talk.  If we don’t take our own advice, who are we fooling?  Nobody but ourselves!

Enough true confessions.  I admit it.  I have not always listened to my own advice…and some of it was pretty darn good if I do say so myself.  LOL.  One thing good has come out of this discussion.  When I give someone else advice from now on, I am going to look in the mirror and see if I am doing it myself.

Am I treating others with respect, love, grace, and mercy?  Am I forgiving people that have wronged me?  Am I managing my finances properly and living within my means?  Am I putting the needs of others ahead of myself?  Am I keeping my relationship with God a priority?  Am I treating my spouse as a queen, and valuing her only second to God?  Am I being the right example to my family, to my friends, to my business associates?

When I put it in those terms, I sure have a lot to do myself.  When you think about me…say a prayer for me that I can be the person that I advise others to be.  I think I give pretty good advice, now I just need to take it myself.

Shalom!

Dan Skognes

Have You Settled?

Posted in Motivational, Relationships, Spiritual

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As I look at people that I have in my life,  people that I meet every day, and even the ones I see on TV or read about in the news, I see faces of people who have settled.  They have settled:

  • For a mediocre marriage.
  • For not ever having a fulfilling job to do.
  • For a life without meaning or direction.
  • For a life without God.
  • For being in debt all their life.
  • For being in poor health.

Why would anyone settle for that?  It is downright depressing to live like that, and yet that is exactly what a lot of people do.  I would be willing to bet that you know people just like that.  Hopefully this does not describe you.  But…it if does, that can be changed.  It begins with some brain surgery and heart surgery.

Here are a few simple things to do to break that cycle, but they are not necessarily easy:

  • Begin by changing the way you think.  If you have given up dreaming, start dreaming again.  See yourself in a healthy marriage.  See yourself doing work that you absolutely love to do.  See your life fulfilled and meaningful.  See your relationship with God intimate, loving, and vital.  See yourself being debt free, and having not just enough money to survive, but more than enough so you can bless others.  See yourself in great health and enjoying the days ahead pain free.
  • Change the way you feel.  If you live by how you feel, doing only those things that you feel like doing, this will be especially hard for you, but you have to start doing things that you don’t feel like doing.  You have to start doing the things that you know you should do, but have been putting off.  Start communicating openly with your spouse.  Get counseling if necessary. Start identifying what you are good at and looking for work that has a need of those skills. Don’t stop till you have found the right job.  Don’t chase the money.  Chase your passion. Quit the negative self-talk and quit hanging around with people who are negative (I told you this would not be easy).  Quit stiff-arming God.  He is still patiently waiting for you to come to Him and have a meaningful relationship.  Quit spending money you don’t have.  Get a budget and keep to it.  Start saving as soon as you can, and start investing.  Give to others that are in need. Quit doing things that you know are bad for your health.  Smoking, drinking too much, over-eating, not exercising, not getting proper rest.  All of those will eventually catch up and affect your health.  Take care of your body.  You only have one, you know.
  • You can change the way you think and change the way you feel, but if you don’t do this part, it probably won’t change at all.  Have someone to hold you accountable.  I don’t know why this works, but it seems to be that we are more likely to do what is right for ourselves if we have someone who is looking us in the eye every week and saying, “How are you doing on that job search?”  Or, “How are things going with the marriage?” Or, “How are things with you and God this week?”  When you know those questions are coming, it helps you be honest with yourself.

My hope for you is that you are willing to go through the brain surgery and heart surgery if necessary.  Cut out the stuff that you have settled for, and then re-ignite the flames of passion for life.  Find someone to hold you accountable.  Just make sure they are not a “settler.”

One of my all-time favorite movies is the classic, It’s a Wonderful Life, with Jimmy Stewart.  He was tempted to settle many times in the movie. He was so despondent at one point that he was ready to commit suicide. Then he had the revelation from God of what his life meant.  All of a sudden, his perspective changed.  He shook off the self-pity, re-engaged with God and his wife, and went to war.  He was like the Energizer Bunny on steroids.  Other people were encouraged by his enthusiasm and his creative ideas on getting through the mess they were all in.  What a great message for all of us.  Please, for the sake of yourself, your family, your community, your nation, and the world, don’t settle.  It’s a wonderful life, after all.

Shalom!

Dan Skognes

Identify Your Why

Posted in Business, Motivational, Relationships

Identify Your Why dan skognes insurance finance motivation blogger speaker entrepreneur (360x225)

 I realize this will really date me, but when I was growing up, there was a song that was called “Why Do Fools Fall In Love?”  LOL.  Now THERE is a topic that has no answer!  We won’t even attempt to chase THAT rabbit trail.

What I do want to answer is “The Why” that makes you and I do the things we do.  What motivates us to do things that sometimes we don’t understand ourselves?  What drives us? What frustrates us? What stimulates us? What causes us to make decisions one way or another?

When you are looking at yourself in the mirror, how do you answer this question:  “Why are you doing what you are doing for a living?”  That could be answered a thousand ways, but probably only a handful of reasons might actually be the real reasons you are doing what you are doing. Common answers might be, “To make money.  Because it was the only thing I could find to do at the time. Or, I just needed a job of some sort.”  None of those will ever fulfill you, however.

If you can identify your why, you are on the right track to finding your destiny.  This is a complicated issue, and I claim to be neither a psychologist nor a psychiatrist, but knowing yourself is a pretty basic need that we have to come to grips with in order to be fulfilled.

In my case, I like the opportunity to make unlimited income. I like serving and connecting people.  I enjoy building teams and multiplying their efforts.  But you know what a very basic reason is?  I discovered I am pretty good at it.  People seem to like me and trust me, and that energizes me.  My clients appreciate the fact that I am not just a slam-bam-thank-you-Mam type of consultant, but I am there for the long haul.  I truly care about them, their families, their business, and their future…and they know it. They know that I seek to serve them.

The same holds true for my blogging.  I have been told that I am pretty good at it.  I enjoy giving the gift of encouragement and having the ability to express it in writing.  It makes me come alive when I create a blog.  What amazes me is how using that gift not only energizes me but touches the hearts of people around the world.  With the internet, it truly is a small world after all.

I love connecting people both professionally and personally.  That is why I gravitated to sales, training, and consulting.  That is why I blog regularly….to build and sustain relationships, and to encourage others.  That is how I am wired.   That is my why.

What if we just kept our gifts to ourselves?  We would be missing the personal blessing of being fulfilled in our lives, and we would be missing the opportunity of being a blessing to others.  You have to identify your why, then use the gifts God has given you.  That is like realizing you have been given a present, and now you are ready to unwrap it.  When you open it up, you discover that you have something not only for you, but something to share with others.  That is an awesome way to live. For me I found that true living is giving.

So, what is YOUR WHY?

Shalom!

Dan Skognes

Change

Posted in Motivational, Spiritual

Change

How do you feel about change?  If you are like most people, you don’t really like it.  Why?  We are creatures of habit.  We like to know that some things are constant.  The problem is, change is coming, like it or not.

If you want to see a funny thing happen, sit in the chair or pew at church that someone else always sits in.  They will look at you like you have committed the unpardonable sin.  I have done this accidentally on more than one occasion.  All I can say is, “Awkward!”  They give you that stern look to make you know that you should be ashamed of sitting in “their seat.” I don’t go to those churches anymore, by the way.

Almost everything around us is changing.  Our minds, our bodies, our environment, our socio-economic status, the weather, our health, our influence, politics, the stock market, you name it….it is changing.  You notice I said almost.  There is one constant, thank God.  And it IS God.

He is the one thing that never changes.  He is the one thing we can count on to be there for us.  There is an old saying, “There are two things you can count on, Death and Taxes.”  That is true in this life, but does not take into account eternity.  God has eternal perspective and is timeless. The one thing that you can truly count on is God.  He does not change.

How do you cope in a world full of change?  How do you keep your feet planted on ground that is always shifting?  How can you rely on anything or anybody in this world when everything is changing?

Well, not all change is bad. Much of the change we go through is good.  If we become a kinder person, if we start taking our job more seriously, if we start taking care of our bodies (eating right, exercise, proper rest, etc.), if we treat our family with love and respect, if we start honoring God with how we live, if we stand up for what is right and take a stand against what is wrong, all of those are examples of changes that are good.

Next time you get offended when something changes, step back and ask yourself why you are reacting that way.  Look at the change objectively.  Is there any good that will come out of it?  Is there any good that will come out of your stewing over it?  Change is coming, but you get to choose how you will respond.

You have an incredible day ahead of you.  I can promise you this, it is FULL of change. I hope you are energized by the changes that lay before you.  With change comes opportunity.  When opportunity knocks, open it.  You just might find that the change you are facing is what you have been praying for.  You just did not recognize it at first.

Shalom!

Dan Skognes

The Mask

Posted in Relationships

The Mask1

Remember the movie with Jim Carrey?  He has the most incredible face and is able to make the funniest expressions.  I am a big Jim Carrey fan. I love his off-the-wall sense of humor, but wearing a mask is something not so funny in real life.

We have all known people who wear masks.  I am not talking about literal masks.  I am talking about the posers:  the people who pretend to be one thing, and secretly are another.  The people I am referring to are those that often don’t even realize that they are wearing a mask.  They have deceived themselves.

That is pretty scary when you think about it.  We can be so deluded that we don’t even know we are wearing a mask.  How in the world can THAT happen?

Principle 1. Masks are what we put on to cover up our insecurities.  We think that if we wear the mask, nobody will see that we are fearful, insecure, vulnerable, and weak.

Principle 2. Masks are something that we need to take off.  Be willing to be real and transparent.  It is OK to admit you don’t have all the answers.  It is OK to admit you have made mistakes.  That does not make you a loser. That makes you human.

Principle 3. You will never experience true intimacy with anyone when you are wearing a mask.  There is something beautiful about just being real.  When you open up your heart to someone else and let them see who you are, that is the start of a deeper relationship.  That is the seed of authenticity that can grow and develop into something meaningful and lasting.

Are you wearing a mask?  Are you transparent?  Can you admit when you are wrong?  Can you admit you are not perfect?  Please, for the sake of everyone around you, take off your mask and just be real for once.  You just might find that others will be OK with that, and you will be a lot happier just being YOU.

Shalom!

Dan Skognes

God’s Timing

Posted in Spiritual

Gods Timing (225x225)

God’s timing is hard for us to understand because He is outside of time.  He always has been and always will be.  That is pretty mind-blowing when you think about it.  No beginning, and no end.

A couple of things I have come to understand about God’s timing though.

  • He is always on time.
  • He is always just in time.

We tend to get anxious about things in life because we see the clock ticking. We have bills to pay, things to do, people to see, places to go, needs to be met.  It is so easy to stress out about time because there is so little of it.  We are here for just a fraction of a second in eternity.

Isn’t it strange that the older you get, the faster time seems to go?  When we were kids, one hour could seem like eternity if you were sitting in church.  OK, depending on what church you go to, that could still be true. LOL  Now the years literally fly by.

I look back at the last 10 years and wonder where the heck they went.  How did I get to be old so soon? Wasn’t it yesterday that I was in college footloose and fancy free?  Good grief.  Now I am approaching my “golden years.”  I am not sure why they call them that, except I have more gold in my teeth now.  Time is like a roll of toilet paper.  The closer to the end you get, the faster it goes!

With God, time is irrelevant.  He does not stress over time.  He does not worry about it.  He does not get anxious one bit.  Why?  He is God…and He dwells in realm outside of time.  Why is that significant to us?  Since He created us, and He created time for us, we can trust His timing.

If we put our faith in Him, we can trust Him that He will be there for us.  I can tell you that God has come through for me throughout my life.  Sometimes it is at the 11th hour, but He always comes through to give me what I need (not necessarily what I want).

That gives me peace of mind.  That takes a load off of my shoulders knowing that God’s timing is perfect, because He is perfect.  Things don’t always happen in the time that we want them because they don’t fit in God’s timing.

When it is the right time from God’s perspective, then things fall into place.  We typically don’t like that because we like to be in charge and think that we know what is best in regards to when things need to happen.  The problem is that we have a one dimensional viewpoint of time.  God sees the past, present, and future.  We simply have to trust Him to help us navigate the day before us.

My hope is that we keep time in perspective.  It does no good to fret about yesterday, and does not help to worry about tomorrow.  We need to just use our time wisely today.  Hopefully the time you took to read this was a blessing.  My desire is that you use your time today to rethink your priorities. Wasting time may be one of the greatest tragedies of life.  It is a gift.  Cherish it and make the most of it. You have no promise of tomorrow, so what are you going to do with today?

Shalom!

Dan Skognes

The Thrill of Victory

Posted in Business, Motivational, Relationships

The Thrill of Victory (360x240)

When I was growing up, there was a TV show called the Wide World of Sports.  They would show  athletic events at the beginning of each show, and the announcer would say, “The thrill of victory, and the agony of defeat.”  The picture that I can’t seem to get out of my head is the skier going down the giant slalom and taking a terrible fall.  I always wondered what happened to that guy.  How would you like THAT to be your claim to fame?  Can you imagine him at a dinner party?  “Yeah, I was the guy that nearly killed himself on the slalom every week.”  How embarrassing would that be?

Think about famous people you have known that had great victories…and then agonizing defeats.  Politicians like Richard Nixon (Watergate) and Bill Clinton (Monica Lewinsky).  Athletes like Mark McGuire and Lance Armstrong (both caught doping).  Business leaders like Bernie Madoff and Kenneth Lay, Chairman of Enron (both guilty of scamming).  And don’t get me started on all the famous preachers that have fallen.  They are too numerous to count.

We have all known to some degree both sides of that coin, haven’t we?  Obviously we have probably not had that degree of press, but still, we have seen victories, and we have seen defeats.  The examples listed above were self-inflicted wounds that were finally made public and the truth came out in the end.  Sometimes, we have done that in our personal lives, and sometimes it has been in our professional lives.  I know that I have shot myself in the foot more than a few times in both arenas.  I wish we could have do-overs, but unfortunately, we cannot change the past.  All we can do is learn from it and move on.

The great thing about life is that we get to look forward to changing the future.  The thrill of victory is sweet because we have tasted defeat.  We know the pain, the agony, the embarrassment of losing.  Nobody likes to lose, yet it is a part of life.  It is part of the give and take.  It is part of the circle that brings us around to victory.

Is there a way to shorten the loss cycle and have more victories?  Well, if you ask a coach, he will tell you:

  • Master the basics (Vince Lombardi, “This is a football.”)
  • Have a game plan (write out your goals and strategy)
  • Learn from your mistakes (watching game films and evaluate what went wrong)
  • Adapt to the competition (if your strategy is not working…change it)
  • Prepare before the game begins (conditioning, studying, memorizing)
  • Manage the losses that come and keep them in perspective for the season (a loss does not make you a loser)
  • Don’t cheat (the truth will come out eventually)
  • Value people. Relationships matter (your team, your company, your family)

Whether it is your personal or your professional life you want to address, my hope is that your Win/Loss record improves.  That will only happen when we take responsibility for our actions, learn from our mistakes, humble ourselves, and value people.  May you taste the “Thrill of Victory,” and may your defeats be few and far between.

Shalom!

Dan Skognes

Signs You Are Getting Old

Posted in General, Relationships

MSDGROL EC009

There is nothing good about getting old.  Seriously.  I don’t like it.  It dawned on me when I went back to my college homecoming that I was part of the club.  When I was in school I remember seeing all the “old people” come to homecoming.  The funny thing is, when I went back to homecoming not long ago, I still saw all the “old people.”  Somehow I had missed looking in the mirror.  

I started thinking about some of the things old people have in common:

  • They begin sentences with, “I remember when we didn’t have a ______________.”
  • Their backs go out more than they do.
  • Their teeth are like the stars, they come out every night.
  • Hair grows in all the wrong places.
  • Hair is missing from all the right places.
  • They look forward to watching Wheel of Fortune every night.
  • They get excited about Sr. Citizen Discounts.
  • The schedule that used to be filled with work is now filled with activities with the grandkids and being a baby sitter or chauffeur.
  • They have discovered that the naps they dreaded as children are now their friend.
  • They have a hard time watching an entire movie without dozing off.
  • They are less fashion conscious and tend to have their “favorite” outfits that usually have holes in them or paint on them.
  • They have a morbid curiosity to see who is in the obituary each day.
  • Their memory is fading on what they did today, but they can tell you what they did 30 years ago in great detail.
  • They shrink.
  • They long for “The good old days.”
  • They will just blurt out what is on their mind without any forethought and people just forgive them because they are “old.”
  • They break wind when they feel like it.
  • They tell you the same story for the hundredth time.
  • They see people that are in their 50’s as young.

There are just way too many things on this list that I can identify with, and I don’t like it one bit.  Now if I could just remember when I left my glasses. 

Here is to all of my Senior friends.  May your days be as long as your memory allows. May they be filled with laughter, peace, and of course…..Wheel…………….Of…………..Fortune.  How old is Vanna White anyway???  She is like the female Dick Clark.  She does not seem to age. I want a job like hers.  I know I could touch the letters that are called just as good as she does.  Just sayin.’

Shalom!

Dan Skognes

Perils of a Home Office

Posted in Business

Perils of a Home Office (360x282)

Having your office at home certainly has it’s advantages (my commute is 5 feet to the office in the morning), but it can have some disadvantages too.  I love my dogs, but there is a reason we call them Dumb and Dumber.  Our Lhasa-poo is named Molly, and our Boxer is named Laila.  We don’t need the Dog Whisperer.  We need the Dog Shouter.  They are deaf.  Don’t get me wrong.  They can hear, but they choose NOT to hear, if you know what I mean.  They are like kids that are trying to get your attention.

The other day I was in my office on the phone with a client I had never met.  I was trying to discuss what issues they were facing, and all was going well until Molly came into my office and laid on her back and started scratching her back on the carpet and going GRRRRRR , GRRRRRRR, GRRRRRR!!!  I was mortified.  I was trying to get her quiet and not lose my train of thought. All I could do was get down there as quickly as possible and rub her belly to keep her quite.  It was ridiculous!

Another day I was on my couch in the living room when a business call came in.  Laila, my boxer likes to sit next to me on the couch.  Normally she is fine sitting there, but this time she decided to start licking herself.  It was so loud that I was trying to figure out how to mute the phone and make her stop all at the same time.  My eyes were bugging out of my head at that point and I was giving her one of those looks that said, “If you don’t stop that, you are going to go see Jesus today!” You know that look…the one you give your kids when they are misbehaving in church.  Come to think of it, I used to get quite of few of those looks when I was a kid.  Is this payback, Lord?

And then another day, my wife decides to start mowing the yard when I am in my office on the phone.  Our back yard is right next to my office, so it sounds like a Mac Truck when she goes back and forth mowing the yard.  I suggested that she might want to do that in the evening, like after she made my dinner and Wheel of Fortune was over, but that did not work for her.  I thought it made a lot of sense though.  She could have been using that time in the morning more productively and fixing the transmission on her van, or fixing that leaky faucet.  I have been reminding her for weeks now about those things, but she seems forgetful for some reason.  She is a good woman, but she is going to have to get her priorities straight, if you know what I mean.

If you have pets, kids, spouses, siblings, roommates, or any other possible distraction, just know that you will have embarrassing noises that you cannot easily explain.  You know the expression that “You only make a first impression once?”  Well, take my advice and make sure you are isolated as much as possible when you make your business calls.  Of course, even then you can’t control the barking dogs when someone rings the doorbell or knocks on the door.  You would not believe the crazy barking that goes on when our dogs hear anything unusual.  Very often it is my wife or me they are hearing, but that does not matter.  They are going into a barking frenzy until they know for sure who it is and that person is in the house.  I am telling you…they are Dumb and Dumber.

I tried going out in my car one time to make a conference call.  I was in a parking lot at a 7-11.  What happened?  A guy parks right next to me in a Hummer, and his rap music is so loud that the windows on MY car were vibrating.  Sometimes you just can’t win, you know?

Good thing that God gave me a sense of humor.  That is all I am sayin.

Shalom!

Dan Skognes